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Post by Hellbreaker on Aug 12, 2015 12:21:31 GMT -8
Fulgur blinks as the navis intakes his thralls, using the power to begin a transformation.Fulgur gulps, feeling something come off the darkloid. He shakes, wanting to run, but focuses, the shaking stopping as the young Navi stands his ground. He watches, his kneesbent and ready to dodge, as it finishes.So....this was his upgraded form? A vampire, indeed. Fulgur blinks as his foe raises a modified buster, and dodges in time, seeing a tree destroyed. And so, he does the smart thing....he runs, dodging the blasts as he shoots back at the vampire. After a bit, the navis skids to a stop, looking down at his buster."It....looks like I'll have to use that." He turns around, streamers of electricity appearing as his visible eye glows." I told you, didn't I? There is always light....."
(For YOUR listening pleasure +_+: )
At first, it appeared he was using the recovery again, but more and more streamers appear, the concentrated light making it appear as if day had come onto the forest. All these streamers begin to flow into his buster, his cloak floating as if in a breeze.
Battle 5/7
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Post by Mega on Aug 12, 2015 12:31:27 GMT -8
Battle 5/7
Nightwalker's current form was his trump card. By harnessing the power of all those he has drained, he can reach the apex of his power. His decision not to use it at the start of the fight was not from arrogance, but practicality. While this form gave him tremendous power, it would not last indefinitely. If he used it too long, he would fully drain the power gained from all the navis he had drained during his time on the net.
His firing was cut off short by a blinding light, making him hiss and shield his eyes with one of his wings. This was not simply due to him being a vampire. The light was just that bright. "Yes. More! Bring me more!" Nightwalker demanded when the light dimmed just enough that he could see. "Try to destroy me, scatter my data to all corners of the net!" Nightwalker continued, both on a high with his increase in power and an overwhelming bloodlust. Battle and conquest were all he knew.
There might be light, but even the brightest light casts the darkest shadow. Arming another buster, Nightwalker opened up with a powerful volley of shots before taking to the air with his wings. He propelled himself toward Fulgur, changing both of his busters into dark glowing claws that he brought to bare on his foe. There was no further need to dance around his opponent and use trickery. Power was only good if it was used, and he was going to make every second of this power count.
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Post by Hellbreaker on Aug 12, 2015 13:26:31 GMT -8
Fulgur closes his eyes, feeling the power move through him. This was his greatest attack at the moment..He ignores the Navi, breathing in from peace.He couldn't even feel the shots, though they damaged him. Then, it was ready. Fulgur's eyes fly open, and he looks at the charging NightWalker." I'm sorry, but...its too late." The young wanderer raises his buster, the air around him stirring as he braces himself."...Defluo"He fires, and his cloak is blasted straight back as a huge beam of concentrated lightning, capped by a roaring wolfs head, flys at the vampire, turning the environment even more bright. Despite being braced, Fulgur still slides backward a couple of inches. Battle6/7
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Post by Mega on Aug 12, 2015 14:12:28 GMT -8
Battle 6/7
Nightwalker clearly saw a counter attack coming, and used his flight to his advantage by twisting around to avoid. But he had not been expecting an attack quite that size. The power would be spread out too thin to do any fatal damage on it's own, but dark and light were clashing forces. In the end he managed to avoid the brunt of the attack, but ended up losing a wing and one of his arms.
But this didn't slow him down, as dark energy coursed from his body. He closed the rest of the distance with Fulgur and literally sent them both crashing to the ground with one clawed hand grasped tightly around Fulgur's throat. The dark energy then reconstructed his body, but his heavier armor seemed to be dispersing now. It took alot out of him to regenerate his limb. But Fulgur after his previous injuries couldn't have been doing much better. Nightwalker pulled his free arm back and attempted to drive it through Fulgur!
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Post by Hellbreaker on Aug 12, 2015 14:41:04 GMT -8
The Wolf Roar finishes, and Fulgur staggers, feeling the effects of the blasts now. He shudders, groaning.This hurt...Why did he feel pain anyway? He was a Navi...Data poured from his body.Then,Fulgur is grabbed by the neck, and struggles. He sees a arm rearing back, and jerks his arm back, deflecting the hand into where his lung would be. Biting back a scream, the navi activates his sword, attempting to drive the blade deep into the vampires chest.
7/7
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Post by Mega on Aug 12, 2015 15:02:12 GMT -8
Battle 7/7
He was too close to move out of the way, and he had Fulgur where he wanted him. Nightwalker was more then willing to make whatever sacrifice it took to get what he wanted. But he may have burned through too much energy earlier with generating his thralls. Combined with the energy he burned while in his seraph form, and add in regenerating his arm and wing- it was very possible he might not make it after all. "Your power... will... be mine!" Nightwalker stated slowly, his body bleeding out darkness as if it was having trouble keeping together.
Inspite of the sword impaled through him, he was not about to give up now. It was taking a great deal of effort to avoid returning to the darkness that fueled him, but he managed to move his hand still clenched around Fulgur's throat to his jaw. He then tilted Fulgur's head to give him access to his neck. Were things getting darker or was his body releasing more darkness then a moment ago? Had to hurry! "Aahh," Nightwalker rasped, baring his fangs and then...
((And now to drag a willing staff member over here xP))
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Post by notegg on Aug 12, 2015 16:38:00 GMT -8
Alright, here we go. Judging you both at the same time so I don't have to make too posts woo!
Style:
First off you forgot to select a version you were fighting at. Judging by Nightwalker's general powerset and Fulgur Animus' final blows, I'm going to peg you at around versions 5-7. But you bakas need to select a version when version bonus is off! Baka baka (9)!
Secondly, both of you lose points for being pretty sparse in your self and world descriptors. Dark forest, right, got it. Anything special? No? Okey dokey. Because I'm not familiar with either of your characters, a bit of explanation or other description of their general appearances would have helped.
As for the rest of your style points, Nightwalker wins out just a slight because of that awesome introduction. I was legitimately chilled at the point he bit into the other navi, and a little surprised. Well played. I did enjoy the description of Fulgar's final attack, with the wolf head, though it was a slight awkward, it was very cool.
NW: 18/30 FA: 17/30
Articulation:
Sorry Fulgar. I'm not sure if you're posting from a phone or otherwise, but there were a lot of grammatical issues which made your posts difficult to read. Before you post, do a quick once over and make sure you've got spaces where they ought to go. As well, breaking your text into paragraphs would help a lot with flow. Despite that, your sentences are well thought out and understandable, so you don't lose this one completely.
Nightwalker's stuff was a lot clearer and well articulated. As above, it could use a little extra description here and there, but is otherwise well thought out and well done.
NW: 7/10 FA: 3/10
Balance:
You both played this really well. I think there was a lot of balance both mentally and within the framework of the fight itself. NW came on a little strong I think, but Fulgar definitely fought back hard. The end of the fight encapsulates this almost perfectly, with the both of you caught with fatal wounds, neither truly winning out.
NW: 19/20 FA: 20/20
Length: Not much to say here. FA was a little short while NW was a little too lengthy in sections, but overall you both did well to match each other. NW wins a point a bit because of paragraphs, as well.
NW: 8/10 FA: 7/10
Emotion:
This is the part FA wins a lot in. For some reason, his roleplay just encapsulates a young, unsure shonen action hero really well. Nightwalker's RP, though well thought out, felt a little stilted or typical in terms of villainy. He stands out as a good vampire, but it didn't really feel like he had anything more than that, feeding and growing more powerful. His tempting of Fulgar was well done, however, and Fulgar's reaction was also played well, so you both win points for strong synergy.
NW: 6/10 FA: 8/10
Judge Points:
Judging based on music. Both tunes were good, with NA's being a good theme for a vampire fight, and FA's was very dissonant, in a last hope sort of way.
10/10 for music.
Total Score:
NW: 68/100 FA: 65/100
I'm a hard marker, I know, and I'm sorry. You both did well, but not quite close to A Rank. My biggest suggestions for improvement lie in setup: Describe yourself, your opponent, your surroundings etx a little big more. You're both very strong in terms of style and description, but lacking in world-building. Action is difficult to write, and despite that you both do it very well, keep working hard and you'll be even greater writers, the likes of which have never been seen!
(On that note, I'd rank most of my RP as pure garbage, so you both did way better than I usually do :P)
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